Wednesday, July 23, 2008

When a loved one passes

A whole new batch of experiences, events and memories hit you when a loved one passes. Here are some of them:

- A bunch of emergency workers invade your house. I have been a part of this before, so I was able to understand and explain what was going on to my mom. By the way, the Jefferson County Deputies and Firefighters in Colorado were great. Very professional, helpful and compassionate.

- You have to tell people what happened. If it is sudden, it is hard to accept it yourself, then you have to tell way too many people about it. My older brother and I had to go to my little brother's house to tell him my Dad had just died. That was really hard.

- Before you know it, you are at the funeral home deciding what to do with your loved one's remains. As compassionate as they try to be, it is shockingly expensive.

- Everyone tells you to let them know if they can do anything for you. It is great, but you don't really know what to have them do.

- You start to cry at unusual times.

- You are hit with memories when you don't expect them. we went to bury my dad in the town where I grew up and I felt like I couldn't turn around without "seeing" a memory of doing something with my Dad.

- People share their memories of your loved one, and you appreciate every one. Both of the Funeral homes we worked through had an online memory thing where people that knew my Dad shared some thoughts, a couple of his close friends blogged about getting to know him, some friends and family shared memories at the funeral and graveside services and numerous people shared thoughts, cards and phone calls. It was very cool to see the impact my Dad had on the lives of others. It was even a blessing to have people just show up for the services.

- Before you know it, the whole experience is over and you wonder what you should do next.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Love you, Matee. See you soon, y' brigand.

Anonymous said...

rrrrrrrrr, i second that

Anonymous said...

by the way, what's a brigand?

Anonymous said...

wouldn't that be with one 'b'?