Wednesday, June 2, 2010


I was out for a run this morning and I thought, "Why am I doing this!?! This makes me totally uncomfortable!"

So, instead of giving up or falling in a heap on the trail and weeping uncontrollably, I tried to think of other things that have made me absolutely miserably uncomfortable. Here are a few of them.

Wearing a gas mask.

When I was in training in the military, we had to put them on, run in them, shoot in them and do all sorts of other crazy things while trying to breathe through the filters that filter out some chemical agents and most of the air. It was hot, stuffy and the early ones had two bug eyes to look out of that made you feel like you were peering sideways out of a small box. It made you want to scream.

That was uncomfortable.

Oh, until we did the gas chamber thing. That was considerably more uncomfortable. After that, I kind of liked wearing my gas mask. It was my friend.

Deathly Ill in Jabalpur

We just had a great week of teaching pastors and hanging out with the medical and theological students at the Central India Christian Mission in Damoh. at the end of the week, Dr. Lall and his wife Indu made us a fantastic feast with all sorts of Indian and American foods. I, of course, ate too much.

After dinner, we were off to Jabalpur for some more teaching. Since the road to Jabalpur (which I think is also the name of one of those Bob Hope and Bing Crosby movies) was a bumpy dirt road, I thought the sickness I was beginning to feel was just from some mild food indiscretions and a little motion sickness from all thebouncing around. By the time we arrived at the hotel in Jabalpur, I realized that it was worse than that.

Diane tells me I babble insensibly when I have a fever anyways, so I must have sounded like a raving lunatic to anyone that happened by the room. I do remember calling her after puking my guts up over and over and letting her know that I was ready to come home.

That was uncomfortable.

For some reason, she didn't immediately find me a ticket home like I demanded. The fever broke in the morning, buckets of sweat poured off of me and I had a good breakfast. After all that, I was ready to go see the beautiful falls at the fast flowing Narmada river.

Crushed at Class

If you didn't get it from the gas mask post, I lean towards claustrophobia. Well, I don't find it unreasonably fearful at all to not want to be crushed or suffocated, so claustrophobia doesn't seem accurate.

During the Krav Maga training I did for a few years, someone had the bright idea of coming up with a new drill to help develop our mad fighting skills. They would make you lay on the floor face down, throw one of those wrestling mats on top of you and everyone would pile on top of the mat and you had to fight your way out.

Actually, it was kind of fun when you were on top of the mat. The fun wore off quickly when it was your turn to be crushed and suffocated. I think I bit someone, tried to twist someone else's foot off and was trying to gouge people's eyes out before I finally got out from under the pile.

That was uncomfortable.

How Are You Doing?

When we lived in Sacramento, I was attending a conference for our Denomination's Sacramento district, when I was approached by the Pastor of one of the larger Churches on the District. I barely knew the guy, and had never talked to him.

"How are you doing", he asked me, in what I assumed was the friendly sort of greeting that you throw at people that you barely know.

I told him I was doing good, which I thought was an honest and adequate answer. Apparently he did not agree. He squared off with me, like a boxer in the ring. He looked at me with his soul piercing preacher eyes and asked me, in his best compassionate, concerned, probing pastor voice, "No really, how are you doing?"

Since I really didn't know how to reply to this, wondering if he knew something I did not, I repeated that I was doing good and have done my best to avoid that guy the rest of my life.

That was uncomfortable.

That was a good start of things that have made me uncomfortable. A few others have been left on the editing room floor. Come back around sometime soon. I'll tell you some of the things that make my wife Diane uncomfortable. That should be fun.

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